The season of Advent, of waiting for the Christ. We celebrate at Christmas, the incarnation of Jesus and his coming to Earth. Being fully God, and fully man. Living among us, feeling all of the feels, laughing the laughs, crying the tears, and dying a death on the cross to save us from the punishment of sin.
This season, I have been listening to daily devotions from The Worship Initiative on their free Sing app.
They have released special Advent devotions that circle back to the verses of "O Come O Come Emmanuel".
Each day's devotion is ended with this phrase:
The promise of the Savior has come true in the incarnation of Jesus.
And yet, we continue to wait for the promise of His return to make all things new.
I've never paid much attention to "O come O come Emmanuel" in the past, but this year it has really spoken to me, and keeps popping up all around me. Just yesterday I was introduced to Skillet's version which very dramatically showcases the turmoil that the earth feels as we wait for Christ's return. We are crying out for Jesus to come and make things right again!
The suffering of this world is dark, heavy. We wait in a constant season of Advent.
I think about how my Dad suffered with dementia, how our family has been through so much these past few years, and how we still have quite a journey ahead. Yet I know this is only temporary. We wait for God to fulfill his promises.
Today, I rejoice in the fact that Dad is finally whole and that he is able to spend this Christmas with Jesus.
There is no waiting, no Advent, in Heaven.
Jesus is on the throne.... so every day must be Christmas in Heaven. 💗
Finishing out another year. I usually take some time to read back through old blog posts...and I realized that I posted less than 10 this year. That's a far cry from previous years and a bit discouraging- realizing that I don't really have much to get out of my brain these days.
Looking back over the last few months: I never completed that 21 days of writing. But the 21st Annual Pumpkin Party, Taylor's wedding and Regina's Favorite Things Party all came and went. Good times with all of it.
Greg and I at Taylor and Logan's wedding. October 30,2021
I took the time in the last months to read back through ALL of my past blog posts (that I have published in several bound books, dating from 2005-2019.) I am SO thankful to have those words in print. There were so many moments and stories about my kids that I didn't remember AT ALL! I 'm so glad that I have written evidence of the years past. Sadly there was plenty of entries with evidence of why my kids would need therapy as adults. yikes. (Reading back through those posts.... I realize that I am NOT the same person that I used to be. And I also wish I had written more about the positive things in our lives.) Fortunately, both boys seem to be doing fairly well as young adults and I'm thankful that God got them through some really rough times with their crazy mom.
December:
I always remember that the Christmas season is not my favorite. The commercialism and busyness is overrated. I took advice from a YouTuber and decided not to smash visits with everyone I know into one month. I have arranged to see some of my dear friends in January..... and surprisingly, that helped me focus a bit more on family during my days off from work.
This is our first Christmas as empty nesters.... so I had additional feelings about things. Decorating the Christmas tree was especially hard this year. (Thanks, Greg, for taking on the task, and my whining). The ornaments of my previous life are still strewn in our ornament box.... and I was faced with lots of memories that I wasn't ready for. (Don't worry....I'm making plans to organize and divide ornaments between the boys as we un-decorate this week)
Lucas had to work over Christmas.... so he wasn't able to come home. :(
Turns out that we had a lovely Christmas eve. The step-kids came to visit and share a slideshow of their wedding pictures. Daniel came over in the evening and and we had a video call with Lucas! We were able to catch up with him for almost two hours. We chatted and opened gifts together. It was almost as if he were in the room. :)
So thankful for technology!
Christmas day consisted of lunch with my family and dinner with Greg's family. All in all- a lovely Christmas weekend.
Today...I put away the Christmas decorations. So glad to have that stuff behind us. Till next year.
I think we're ready.... but our preparations haven't taken the normal course this year. Wait for it.
Early in the season, I made the proclamation that we would keep things super simple this year.
Simple decor:
Greg and Lucas put up the Christmas tree. I bypassed the inflatables again this year, just because. And I had majorly downsized my Christmas decor last year.... so decorating was a breeze.
Simple gifting:
Our household agreed to purchase simple gifts for each other. A few of us created Wish Lists on Amazon. Earlier this week, packages started arriving and we realized that they are all addressed to ME..... since we all order through my Amazon Prime account. (It hadn't occurred to any of us to change the addressee name on the orders. haha) So..... no one can open the packages for fear that we will ruin our Christmas surprises.
My idea: Wrap all of the packages, no name tags. On Christmas morning.... we'll pass them out and have an epic unboxing party. Every gift will have a surprise inside. lol
Simple fails:
Yesterday, early morning.... THIS happened.
I think I blame the cat. (May I remind everyone that Greg wanted the cat. ) Ornaments shattered, stand broken with no hope of repair. We decided to clean up the wreckage and call it a day. We'll shop for a replacement when things are on clearance.
Simple solutions:
Behold! Our Amazon packages are wrapped with care and displayed under our Christmas lamp.
I'm certain this will be an unforgettable Christmas!
Merry Christmas everyone! I hope that everyone has a blessed time making new memories this season.
It's been a crazy month. This is the second night at home after spending 20 days at my parent's house. (That's no typo.... 20 days).
I've been 'off of my game' since the weekend of Thanksgiving.
Rewind to the Granny's memorial service which was held the Saturday after Thanksgiving. We welcomed family to town, and enjoyed meeting a few new faces.
I was asked to read part of my previous blog post at the service. (and since I'm terrified of public speaking... it went as expected.... shaky voice and all... ) I was honored to share my memories of Granny. And the memorial was very nice. I think Granny would have been pleased.
The boys and I were thrilled to spend some time with Thad that Sunday. We finally hiked Devil's Marble yard. Well.... technically.... I hiked to Devil's Marble yard and then the boys and Thad proceeded to climb all of those scary boulders. I apparently have maintained my fear of climbing and my fear of falling. I was content to sit on a boulder while the boys explored. (I swear that I heard the cry of a Sasquatch while I was hanging out, but no one believed me).
Anywho.
Dark and early on Monday morning I took Thad to the airport and then proceeded to move out of the house.
My contractor came to demo both of my bathrooms.
I had been planning the bathroom renovation and was excited to get 'em done!
The "7-10" day project didn't go quite as planned. I am beyond grateful to my parents who let us stay with them for the majority of a month! That is a BIG deal! Soooo thankful!!
During the extended stay, I realized that I was getting stressed out about things beyond my control. The tiny details of the bathrooms started to grate at me. I made realizations that I would do things diffferently if I had to do it again.
And at the same time I would tell myself that this is SO much a "first world problem". How dare I freak out about getting new bathrooms?! How shallow and pathetic. How many people have the luxury to get new bathrooms? Reality check, Jill!
I was also freaking out about getting the bathrooms done in time to host two parties on December 20th. I was freaking out about having to clean the construction dust, paint, clean, AND decorate for Christmas. My whole month felt like it was spinning out of control.
Then.... my friend posted a very convincing facebook post that reminded me about Christmas. The real reason. Jesus. Slow down. Stop freaking out.
In one of my moments of reflection I thought about how Mary, the mother of Jesus, was away from home when she had a baby! Talk about confusion and stress. I can imagine that poor girl was 'off her game' when Jesus was born.... being away from home and dealing with labor and a newborn. whew!
(and then a part of me gets jealous that she had Joseph to help her. lucky her.)
The thing is.... as soon as Jesus arrived the earth sighed and Mary's perspective shifted. That baby, Jesus, became the main focus of her life and nothing else mattered.
That's what I tell myself. "Jesus... top priority."
And yet, today, I found myself getting panicky about shower heads. Seriously. crazy. get a grip.
Tomorrow is a new day.
I'm slowly getting back in my game. It's been nice settling in at home and I'm officially beginning my Christmas vacation from work.... so it's all good.
Our extended family agreed, many years ago, to cut out the gift giving and simplify things by letting the kids draw names for Pollyanna. My family has to buy two gifts to exchange. Two. And I've put it off until tonight.
My boys (including Matthew) headed out for an evening of Christmas shopping and cheer. We ate 'fancy' at Applebees, dropped off a few things at people's houses, and then tackled the shopping at Target and Walmart. Mission accomplished... even with three idiotic boys in tow.
I made a surprise stop by Starbucks and treated us all to peppermint hot chocolate and then put my secret plan in action.
Back story: For WEEKS, I have been talking about driving to look at Christmas lights. Both of my boys growl and complain and threaten my life simply at the mention of driving to see the lights. Just to get them riled up I intentionally slam on my breaks in front of any house that has lights. I 'oooh and ahhh' and make a big fuss about even the simplest decorations.
So, after appeasing them with hot chocolate I started to drive. About 10 minutes from our house they start to question "where are we going? Did you miss the exit?" I continued to drive until we hit a neighborhood and I started to do my usual slow down and "look at those lights!" They caught on to my plan and realized that the hot chocolate was just a bribe... and they were stuck in my car with nowhere to go.
Lucas, especially, was furious. He refused to look out of the window and insisted that he was going to take a nap. UNTIL.... we found the house that was synchronized to music. That kid perked up like a kid at Disney World. All three of these big kids were amazed. We must have sat at that house for 20 minutes.
The same neighborhood gifted us with a seductive snowman.... and we HAD to stop and get a picture.
By this time the kids were excited and I continued to drive, appearing lost, until we happened upon another house with a light show. Good times.
I'm thankful it was a successful evening. It was great to see Lucas' attitude change during our trip.
We returned home around 10:30 tonight..... and immediately noticed that The Neighbours had stolen our hippo!
It was a perfect ending to our evening as we laughed and planned our retaliation. I think this Christmas break is gonna be a good one!
This morning I broke up with radio Christmas music. I have had enough.
I visited my blog to re-read, or re-post, my previous thoughts on music, but upon my blog search I see that I have written about this a lot. Especially the Christmas music.
So, here's one more for the record.
I'm a fan of Christmas music at first. But this year I realize that even the old 'birth of Jesus' standbys are getting dingy and worn out. (Except for my favorite "O Holy Night".)
I am politely singing along with the radio for the most part.
The real meaning of Christmas isn't lost on me. But I feel the need for something peppier.
The secular Christmas songs have the same old feel to them.
And that feel is generally about being lonely and wanting to have someone home for Christmas.
There needs to be a song about "please just let me get a date for Christmas". seriously.
So I had the difficult talk with my radio this morning.
"This isn't working out......It's not you, It's me." Etc. etc.
The other two channels that continue to play top 40 music are seriously in cahoots with each other. No lie...... one channel plays the song, and then the next channel plays the same song. There is no joy in switching channels. It's the same crap over and over, a gazillion times each day.
I have pretty much memorized Taylor Swift's new song (which is catchy, yet twisted).... and I know to change the channel before that guy sings about naked ladies and trumpets.
My next car will have one of those nifty little jacks for an iPod. And I will learn how to download music onto some device. It will be amazing. I will listen to what I like. I will sing. I will be happy.
Well, I'm actually really happy right now. This break-up will be a good thing.
We're adjusting back to our routine after a short Thanksgiving break. We had a super quick visit down to see Thayer's family. As I sat and visited with Granny I realized that time keeps rolling.
Granny is 92. She can't remember her last sentence but she has a good, selective, long term memory. She is always ready and willing to talk about her husband, how they met, and how handsome he was. She has a picture of her husband (probably college aged).... and yes, he was a looker. Blue eyes, just like Thayer.
Her husband has been gone for eight years. And I know she longs to be with him again. She bides her time.
As we all do in some way or another.
I've had the weight of uneasiness this week as I think about my friends who are in the midst of much heartache. Loss, death, sickness, slow recoveries, and anticipation for upcoming surgeries.
(please pray for Zack this week!)
So much going on. I have the desire to help.... or to do more.
I feel like I'm using my own village to get it all done these days. And I'm not sure what else TO do.
So I bide my time. And pray.
I hope my people know how much I care.
December is slowing filling up with activity.
After a post Halloween meltdown- when I told the kids that we would never decorate for holidays again.....
I changed my mind and we pulled out the Christmas boxes. The boys put up the tree and we decided to keep things super simple this year. We looked at all of the ornaments and I suggested that they only hang 'circular' ornaments this year. I'm pretty pleased.
I have finally got the ball rolling on my kitchen remodel! Over five years of hemming and hawing..... and I have finally taken action! I meet with the contractor tomorrow to make selections and schedule a start date. This has been a long time coming. It's truly a Christmas miracle that I'm taking this step. really.
(I may post pictures or write more about this as the project progresses.....so please just smile and nod, smile and nod).
Less then three weeks until Christmas break. Wow. The days are rolling by.
I get it. And I want you to know that you are not alone today.
I'm sure that I'm not the only one that stayed up way too late, waiting for the kids to fall asleep... and therefore became a tired weepy mess.
I'm sure that I'm not the only one that couldn't stand another minute of "It's a Wonderful Life"... and decided to watch
"P.S. I Love You" instead. (Well... possibly I am.)
But I'm totally sure that I'm not the only one who cried while stuffing stockings.
I thought of you tonight. Each of you.
Some of you are spending your first Christmas without your husbands.... and my heart breaks into a million pieces for you.
Some of you can count the years without. (this is my sixth).
And some of you have never had a husband to share the moments.
It sucks.
I'm not sure if it ever gets easier. Each Christmas is different.
I haven't always shed tears... but I've felt alone.
I know that our house will fill with family and laughter in the morning. And everything will seem much better to me after a good night's sleep.
I know that some of you may be alone for the day. Please know that I will be thinking of you, and praying for you.
P.S. I Love You, had a great reminder for folks like us:
I've always thought that December was our 'slower' month. And actually, it still is!
I have lots of empty squares on the calendar and there is no urgent need that is overwhelming me.
(Other than some drama related with getting family pictures printed and ready to mail to out of town in-laws.) But I checked that off the list today!
Despite the fact that I keep telling people that I'm not traveling to visit in-laws this Christmas.... I have started planning a 'visiting tour' that the boys and I plan to take during our school break.
All of those out of town friends that I miss and neglect? Well.... we're going to see them! I'm hoping to visit with six families over a period of 4-6 days. No pressure, right?
This will be an exciting adventure :)
I'm also slated to host our family Christmas lunch. By 'host' I mean 'have at my house'. That isn't any pressure except knowing that I'll need the bathroom cleaned in time for Christmas. We'll all bring food and the kids will be thrilled to exchange their Pollyanna gifts with their cousins.
I find it interesting that this season I have been surrounded by friends who are really down.... and others who are really up. I'm finding it hard to relate.
I feel like I'm just coasting in the middle these days. I'm far from depressed... but I'm also far from elated. Christmas just isn't the same without Thayer. And each year tends to become more humdrum. We go through the motions and have a good time.... but the season isn't fantabulous.
Perhaps that comes along with having older children.
It's still good. But different.
The highlight of the season is my Christmas break! We only have five more days of school and work. Then I can enjoy several days of sleeping in! My favorite!
The countdown begins!
Christmas came and went without too much fanfare. Lucas got a camera, Daniel got a camcorder. They also received gift cards and other nifty things from relatives. We tend to keep it simple around here. My boys tend to be very content with what they have. Prior to Christmas, they couldn't even think of anything to ask for this year. (I suppose that could also mean that I spoil them with too much stuff throughout the year. I dunno.)
We postponed our usual after-Christmas trip to South Carolina. We'll be going down later this spring. This is the first time we've been home for so long during a Christmas vacation. It has been marvelous. I have been super excited about sleeping late. I can't even recall what we have done for the past week... but it's been grrrreat!
I can't believe that another year is behind us. This was our fifth Christmas without Thayer.
I managed to fill the stockings on Christmas Eve without tears.
There is always that empty feeling during family gatherings... but it was a little less achy this year.
Looking back on this year.... I realized that I have only blogged 48 times. That is a far cry from previous years. I suppose that it's a good thing. I haven't had too much on my mind that was dying to get out in print.
It also saddens me because I feel like I've lost some of my motivation for writing... and thinking.
I owe most of my lost motivation to the fact that my relationship with Jesus has been pushed to the side this year. I haven't been on close speaking terms with Him. I really want to rekindle my relationship with Him this coming year. I want to reinvest my time to be taught, and inspired, daily.
I have learned several things this year:
I have learned to be content.
I have learned to choose my battles with the boys.
I have learned that each day is a new day. Thank God!
I have learned that acquaintances come and go... but good friends keep showing up, even in the mundane.
My goals for the coming year: 1. Eat out less. 2. have empty squares on my calendar.
I'm sitting in the basement, listening as my boys watch yet another episode of Man Vs. Wild. We haven't seen it in a while because the boys thought we had watched all of the episodes. (They were wrong. I think we have a zillion left.)
Somehow this silly show makes me feel like things are balanced in this house. It's nice to have a man around. Especially one with a fancy accent. hah.
Tomorrow is my last day at work before a lengthy Christmas break. I am excited about some off time. These past few weeks have been packed! There's nothing really to show for the packed-ness.... but I know that we've been running ourselves ragged with something each day.
Somehow I've managed to fill up my free days as well... with totally fun things like chaperoning field trips, a day trip to visit friends, and attending school parties. I think I can manage :)
The boys and I continue on our path of partial normalcy. Not much drama or chaos. Some evenings I sit and think about how far we have come. Sure, we've had some disagreements... but nothing compared to the emotional chaos that haunted us for a long time.
I know that things can change drastically when they become teenagers... so I'm counting my blessings this month and praying that things will continue to look up.
Turns out that I must only blog when I'm stressed out, sad, or really thoughtful about something. And evidently.... I am none of the above.
Things have been going rather well lately. I have no idea what happened to much of the fall. And I have no idea how December showed up so early.... and how the temperature is so unseasonably warm.
In passing, several people have asked, "are you ready for Christmas?"
My response has been "sure?"
I've bought two gifts and somehow I think I'm pretty ready.
Lucas set up, and decorated, our Christmas tree several days before Thanksgiving. Fortunately the tree is in the basement and I've actually only seen it a few times since it appeared. The decorations are meager at my house this year. I think, somehow, I have fewer and fewer as the years pass. (I suppose I'm gearing up for the days when I have a zillion cats and a little table top tree.)
I did manage to put Christmas lights in my windows only to realize that the bulbs were dead.
Last night I ordered an inflatable Hippo for my front yard! I've always wanted a Hippopotamus for Christmas! And I'm sure that the neighbors will be inspired by my completely random Christmas cheer.
It seems that the rest of civilization has an elf on their shelf. I'm super concerned about this new fad. And slightly annoyed.
If so many elves are hanging out in people's homes.... who the heck is making the toys at the North Pole?
Ten minutes ago, I had a wonderful blog in my head.
I was going to write about how my boys woke up to a stocking full of goodies... and how they unwrapped their sweatshirts, and the gifts that they had given to each other.... and they were happy and content.
I was so pleased.
No one said "is this it?" and no one complained about the quantity of items. Daniel even said "thanks for the stocking stuff. This is the best year yet!"
happy sigh.
I had placed their 'big' gifts behind the blinds of our sliding glass door. I casually opened the blinds and the boys spotted their gifts. They were THRILLED to say the least. They were truly surprised. And thankful.
happy sigh.
They were showered with lots of other things by family members. And all was well.
Lucas barely felt the sting that I had intended by shorting him a gift.
He was ecstatic about the things that he received.
For the first time,ever, we skipped out on our evening family gathering at my Aunt and Uncle's house. I felt badly for missing my chance to see the extended relatives, but I think I made the best decision. We stayed home and recuperated from our eventful day. And then we managed to make it to the movies later this evening.
The best gift that I received today was listening to Lucas talk to his Uncle Thad on the phone. I heard a side of Lucas that I hadn't heard in a long time. He was talkative, expressive and interested. Thad brings out the best in my boys, very much like Thayer did.
After overhearing Lucas' conversation, I realize that I need to book our tickets to Arizona, for a visit, soon!
So.... that's the gist of what my happy blog would entail.
Until...
I explained to Lucas that I was going to take a shower and that he needed to put on his pajamas, and be ready for bed when I returned to his room.
Unfortunately.... a good 20 minutes later... he was not in his pajamas.
I proceeded to take away what he was playing with and ALL HELL broke loose.
(if he had simply put on his pjs, he could have played with that toy all night, and I wouldn't have cared. Its the fact that he completely disobeyed me that burns me up!)
Here we go again:
A perfect day, doing what he wants.
"It's time to put on your pajamas".
Screaming maniac.
Conclusion:
1.The toy that caused the problem, and his brand new Wii game have been bagged up and put in my closet. They won't see the light of day for a long time.
2. I'm thinking of getting a one way ticket for Lucas to go and see his Uncle.
3. I really miss Thayer.
So, that my friends, is the recap of our merry Christmas.
(written on Christmas eve)
I've been rockin' this Christmas. I've kept our month pretty uneventful. I've sat at home while others ran around like crazy people, baked and attended cookie exchanges. We've played it easy and I'm proud of myself.
(I tend to run around like that in October... so perhaps December can be my free month)
I did offer to host our family's Christmas cookout tomorrow. And I'm excited about that. This is our first Christmas cookout and I'm thrilled about it. Our menu is easy squeezy... so it doesn't really require long hours in the kitchen.
What I really want to write about here is my kids. I'm not sure why I want to, or need to, justify myself to others... but i feel the need to type it all out of my head.
My kids are like most other American kids. They are sheltered and fed and their needs are met. In fact most of their 'wants' are also met throughout the year. That's why I don't go "all out" on Christmas.
I've said before that my kids get one gift from me and a stocking from Santa. (and then various gifts from grandparents and family).... which altogether turns out to be a fine bounty.
This year, they each asked for one thing. Daniel is getting an electric scooter and Lucas is getting a Wii game. They will be pleased. (They are not expecting me to dish those out.)
I also wrapped sweatshirts for each of them to wear to school. And I bought $5 speakers for Daniel to use with his iPod. And I found a $5 clearance Nintendo DS game that I was going to give Lucas.
But tonight.... I removed the DS game from under the tree and put it in my closet. That dude doesn't deserve it.
During my quiet month at home, I have had time to watch my kids in action. Or lack thereof. We've had tons of free days.
Many very similar to today:
Lucas played Wii for hours. (my first mistake). Then he watched some tv. Rode his bike for a brief time. Daniel did much of the same. ALL day... they did whatever they wanted to.
Then... as soon as I say that it's time to go to church (or anywhere for that matter)... all hell breaks lose. Lucas bitched about having to go to church. And then bitched because I was taking them to eat at the Olive Garden after the service. (I can think of lots of people who would be grateful for the opportunity) argh.
I try to explain that they have had an entire free day... full of doing just what they want to do. Why not set aside an hour for Jesus on Christmas Eve? It is in fact Jesus' birthday that we are celebrating, right?
We get to the church and Lucas mumbles and grumbles the entire service.
We go to dinner and he acts like a caged animal at the dinner table. He's nine. And he's an embarrassment. This kind of behavior is not okay.
I love him. I do.
And I know that I shouldn't trash my kids on my blog. But I'm just typing truth here. And I'm certain, atleast hopeful, that someone else can relate.
We had a good talk about selfishness, and behavior, and being respectful. And he is aware that I was removing some loot from under the tree.
And... of course I have to throw in my two cents about how some kids don't have any Christmas gifts, etc. etc.
I want him to realize that he is not entitled to receiving "things". That gifts and "things" are a privilege.
Yes, I know that we aren't supposed to give gifts based on behavior. A gift is given out of love. A gift is given without expecting anything in return.
But... I've got a kid who thinks he is entitled. And at some point he's got to learn a lesson. It's not always about him.
I was encouraged tonight, when we prayed, that Lucas remembered to pray for the kids that don't have clean drinking water.
I hope he remembers those kids tomorrow.
Alrighty. My kids are 11 and 9.
We've had the 'sex' talk.
And it occurred to me that I had never had the 'santa' talk with them.
I've never said 'yay' or 'nay' about Santa.
From the conception of our family Santa has filled stockings at our house. That's it. Only things that fit in a stocking. Never anything flashy or big. Usually some socks, toothpaste, little toys and maybe a Nintendo DS game the last year or two. Santa has never been very impressive, or talked about too much at our house.
For several years when the kids have questioned, my response has always been, "what do YOU think"? Or I would casually say, "if you don't believe, Santa doesn't come".
I guess that would explain why my 11 year old is still a firm believer.
It occurred to me that I needed to set the record straight after Lucas ruined Santa for my niece. Apparently Lucas had come to a conclusion on his own (probably with the help of peers) and he has teased my niece about this conclusion.... and in turn, her Dad had to tell her the story behind the beard.
It occurred to me that I needed to have the real 'talk' with my kids. They took it well. (because they are smart like that)... but the majority of the talk was that they are not supposed to say 'yay' or 'nay' about Santa to smaller children. We talked about the real St. Nicholas... and how some families choose to 'play santa' and some do not....
Instantly, Lucas was devising plans as to how he was going to break the news to his own kids. He quickly decided that he will put a note in his child's stocking that says, "Dear so-and-so, Santa died. Your parents will fill your stockings. Sincerely, the elves."
nice.
Those of you on facebook have probably seen this article which raises good questions as to why we fall into all of this Santa stuff anyway.
It also made me feel good about not 'overdoing' Santa with my kids.
I've explained that sex and Santa are two subjects that are off limits for little ears. I just pray that my boys will remember this and spare other little ears this season.
It may be too late for my niece, (which I feel badly about), but I'm hoping that there will still be some of that Santa magic for my nephew. :-)
I had to watch the Justin Bieber/ Mariah Carey video of "All I want for Christmas is you", after several people said how disgusting it was.
And it was.
Poor Justin. And creepy Mariah. They are NOT what I want for Christmas. That kid is super cute... but Mariah is old enough to be his mom. insert 'gag'.
I did a Walmart run earlier today and impulsively bought the Michael Buble Christmas album. It is smoooth. I'm enjoying it in the background today. His voice is 'melting'... (that's the best way that I describe him.) And his version of Mariah's song is splendid :)
Anywho, I've listened to the album several times and I'm starting to get irritated at Christmas music again. I'm pretty sure I've blogged about it before. But I think I should reiterate.
Just on Michael's album alone.... I am able to hear:
"All I want for Christmas is You"
"Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas"
"Christmas (Baby please come home)"
"Blue Christmas"
"Cold December Night"
"I'll be Home for Christmas"
Geez. Does every 'secular' Christmas song have to be about this kind of stuff?
I'm not depressed about these songs, as I have been in previous years.... but I guess you can say that I get disgruntled and grouchily think "yeah, my baby won't be home this Christmas.... or any Christmas for that matter. It ain't happenin'. "
I kinda wish someone would write a song about... "Santa bring me a new man for Christmas". I think that would be a winner :)
And Santa, I'd like to place my order for someone a bit older than Justin.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Lucas set up our Christmas tree yesterday. Then he, Daniel and a neighbor kid decorated it. It was done in a flash, and I didn't lift a finger.
I can recall the same thing happened last year.
And there begins a new holiday tradition. :)
I picked through the three remaining plastic tubs that contain our Christmas 'decorations'. And I was reminded that 'yes', I had cleaned out the clutter of Christmas knick knacks sometime after Thayer died. Christmas changed for me that year. And I became a minimalist.
I can remember years past... when I would have to remove pictures and items from rooms, in order to put out all of the Christmas 'stuff'. This year I put a candle in the kitchen, a reindeer by the fireplace, a few other items.... and I was done.
That was easy.
I think, somehow, we have fewer items than last year.
I was surprised, early on, to discover a new Christmas shower curtain that Sabrina gave me last year. I dig it. It doesn't collect dust or clutter things up. So I was thrilled to have reason to clean my bathroom and hang it.
All of that to say... Christmas has arrived at our house.
It's not showy. But I like it.
We made it through another holiday season.
Christmas activities seemed to go smoothly.
Even with my desire to keep things simple, we managed to attend several Christmas events and stay rather busy this month.
Christmas day was fine.
The boys were treated to legos, Wii games, the Loopz game, stocking stuffers from Santa, Bey Blades and books and other goodies from family members. I'd say that they made a pretty good haul.
We enjoyed a brunch with the extended family and dinner with more extended family.
We had a day or so of recovery before we headed to SC to see Thayer's family. We enjoyed a nice visit with Thayer's grandmother, aunt and uncle. The boys also had some play time with semi-distant cousins.
Before heading home, yesterday, their uncle had made plans for Daniel and Lucas to do some rock climbing. They enjoyed about two hours of climbing! I'm continually amazed at how much energy these guys have!
I made the decision to forgo the new years parties this year. We needed a regular ol' evening at home to regroup. This season has been fun.... but overwhelming at times.
The boys were in bed by 8:30 and I was cuddled up and watching Netflix movie by 9.
I just finished watching Touching The Void. It was intense!
(thanks Lois for recommending it!)
I'm warming up to the idea of Christmas. I'm still not too happy about it, but I'm in the acceptance stage, i think. I've even listened to a few Christmas songs. But I draw the line at "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas". That song is just... terribly sad.
I enjoyed the Andrew Peterson, Behold the Lamb of God, concert on Friday. That's always a great way to kick off the Christmas season. Being reminded of Jesus is important these days... in the midst of all of the commercialism. It was refreshing.
The first snowfall of the year appeared on Saturday, along with the city Christmas parade. We participated in the parade with D's drum and flag team. I think it was supposed to be a fun event. The jury is still out. Our group was number 60 in the procession. We arrived at 6pm to line up and didn't move in line until 7:20ish, i think. Standing out in the falling snow, and watching kids cry about their frozen fingers and toes. Not too high on the fun factor. But once we got moving, everything was okay. :)
I'm hoping that's how Christmas will be this year. We're all prepared at our house, and waiting... and I'm hoping that once it gets going, we'll be okay.
I'm most excited about the break from school and work. only a few more weeks!
Wednesday, we had a much needed visit from some marvelous friends.
Yesterday, we slept late. The kids played around the neighborhood and then showed up to assemble the Christmas tree and decorate it. We had discussed skipping a tree this year... but they were in the mood... so I let them have at it. We had a nice thanksgiving meal at my parent's house, a game of scrabble, followed by a trip to the movies to see Megamind. (Which I REALLY enjoyed!) We also made an evening trip to Walmart to buy a space heater for our frigorific basement. Good day, all around.
Today is our first day at home in FOR-EV-ER. My fairytale plan is to hang out around the house all day. Maybe force myself to put out some Christmas decor. Read a little. But I'm secretly planning a trip to go roller skating if my kids will humor me.
The past few days have been great. But I notice an aching feeling that is hovering just below the surface. The holidays are bitter sweet. I'm enjoying special moments with the kids, but at the same time I take a deep breath as I think about how Thayer is supposed to be here for all of this.
The holiday music is draining. So I have made a "NON Christmas" CD for the car. Avoiding the Christmas music seems to be helping.
I'm currently reading Each Little Bird That Sings by Deborah Wiles. Just in case I didn't have enough stuff to depress me, I chose to read a book written for 8-12 year olds in which death is the main topic. It's about a little girl who lives in a funeral home... interesting how I'm drawn to these things. Even more interesting how I'm pretty comfortable on a fourth grade reading level. too funny. I only have a few more chapters to go and I'm hoping that the author will tie it up in a pretty package with a happy ending... but I'm not sure how she'll do it.
Kinda like life. Sometimes we can't see the happy ending, until the end...
I was suddenly widowed in 2008 and was a solo parent to my two boys for nearly 9 years.
I was remarried to my husband, Greg, in 2017.
It's safe to say that the past years have been quite a journey for our family.
It has been a blessing to see how God has written our story and been our provider.
