Covid diaries

I tested positive for Covid.

Don't worry!  By the time you read this..... my quarantine time is over and you, your family, your neighbors, your kids' school and your mailman are safe from any potential exposure.....from me.

I accepted long ago that we were all going to come down with Covid at some point and that it would run it's course.   
I am KEENLY aware that some people get REALLY sick with this thing.  In fact, as I have composed this over the past few weeks... one of my best friends is currently caring for her mother who is recovering from Covid AND anxiously awaiting daily hospital updates about her Dad who is fighting for his life against this virus.   I know this virus is big deal.... and I don't want to sound like I'm taking it lightly. I want to acknowledge that I am aware that it means life and death to a percentage of people....  And if you, or your loved one falls into that percentage.... it can be all consuming and life altering.  

 

However..... I, like the other 99.whatever percentage of people, have recovered and fared pretty well. 

I knew I had possibly, probably, been exposed by a relative of a friend, or the friend, or.... whoever I used the cart after at Food Lion that week.   The symptoms were no more than a severely mild head cold..... a dull sinus headache, stuffiness and 24 hours of body aches.  But the symptoms that tipped the scales was my total lack of taste and smell.    

The moral weight of  "do I go back to work" after feeling super mild symptoms was enormous.....so I went to get tested.   In ANY other reality, I would have just gone on with life as usual.    But in our current reality of guilt and fear of killing your family, friends and co-workers..... I took the high moral road and got tested...... put panic in whoever I had seen that week.....  And then put my family's life on hold for the next 14 days.     (a small price to pay in the grand scheme of things.... and I'm thankful that my symptoms were mild)

I'm still reeling about how Covid has put mass hysteria into our society.    I know I'll be shunned, perhaps crucified, for comparing it to the flu..... but seriously.... the flu, or any virus for that matter, works it's way through the population.   A virus is going to do it's damage.   But when was the last time that we had to contact trace and put witch hunts out for people every time someone gets sick?     Do we shut down entire businesses and keep spouses home from work if a stomach bug or flu goes through a household?     Imagine a society where someone gets the flu and in-turn ten healthy people can't go to work for weeks.   That is happening all around us and we're accepting it.    It blows my mind how we have overturned our entire way of life out of fear.    

  

Where is the church in all of this?!  Where is our faith?!  Where do we place our hope?!  Who holds us in the palm of His hands?!

It's true that researchers are learning more and more about this virus and I'm hopeful that some kind of resolution will come so that we can regain some normalcy in our society.

I have thought so much about our "new norm" over my quarantine and have raged about how inhumane some of our practices have become.   People are forbidden to visit the sick or the elderly.  

Dare I question the correlation of prolonged isolation and the rate of recovery... or quality of life?!

A friend posted this picture on Facebook and I have been thinking about it for a solid week.   His caption read, "You were NEVER safe.   That's not what life is."

This instantly reminded me of the quote from the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe:

"Ooh" said Susan. "I'd thought he was a man. Is he-quite safe? I shall feel rather nervous about meeting a lion"..."Safe?" said Mr Beaver ..."Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you."

God never promised that life would be safe.  

There is risk involved with living.    And living is good.

Each morning I take a walk along my road knowing that I could be hit by a distracted driver.   Each day I get in my car knowing that 40,000 people die each year in car accidents.   Each week I stop at the gas station to fill up my car.  (Have you read the warning signs on those pumps lately?!)

Despite my fear of someone drowning I took my kids to the lake every summer.   Knowing boys have tiny brains AND that Virginia has black bears.... I let my kids go camping with friends.   

The list goes on and on and on.  Life is full of risks.  And LIVING is worth it.

I have followed some of what Mike Rowe has to say about what he coined as "Safety Third".  Some of his opinion pieces have heavily influenced how I have perceived the last several months.  He speaks common sense about how we are responsible for our own safety, and about how living requires taking risks.

I'm all about taking care of our own, taking precautions as needed and looking out for our susceptible relatives.... but I'm NOT a fan of how our society has turned this virus into a reason to hide away, isolate, shun, and avoid contact with people. 
I am heartbroken for the amount of people who are suffering from isolation this year.  The mental health issues, child abuse,  loss of jobs, loss of friends, hunger, thoughts of suicide, those that will ail alone, and those that will die alone.    

Is our "saftey" worth all of that?

We are never safe.  That's not what living is all about.

flying

It was about a year ago, on a Saturday, that I asked Daniel to clean his room and reminded him that he was to start paying me $200/month for rent.    He boldly took out his wallet, handed me $200 in cash and told me he would be moving out on Monday.   

And.... just like that....  He flew the nest.

It's been a full year and I'm happy to say he's still making it on his own.   He and some friends live in a cute little house across the river.   He's working lots of hours, back at the pizza place where he started.   I haven't had to bail him out financially, or bail him out of jail----yet- so I'm very proud of him for the strides he has made this year.

Last February, which unbeknownst to us, would be Lucas' last full month of school, he came downstairs one evening and announced his decision to join the Air Force. He had put lots of thought into it and we were quite pleased with his reasoning.   Since he wasn't sure what he wanted to do with his life.... he knew it would be pointless to incur thousands of dollars of debt to attend college.    He weighed his options and knew that joining the service would give him valuable job training and great benefits while getting paid.  After his time in the military, he knows that he would be able to pursue college for free.  I think it's a win-win, with whatever he decides to do long term.    I was impressed that he came up with all of that on his own.... and of course I'm a very proud mama.

The summer passed and Lucas pursued every inch of what the AirForce had to offer stayed up all night playing video games, slept till 2pm every day, and went to work in the evenings.    This continued till his 18th birthday.  (who am I kidding....he's still asleep as I type this at 1:30pm.)
Anyway....

September rolled around and I reminded him that his 18th birthday was upon us.  He was to either contact a recruiter..... or start paying me rent.   

Low and behold.... he turned 18, contacted the recruiter and got the ball rolling.   He has spent the last two months meeting with the recruiter and gaining weight.    He took the ASVAB (entry test) several weeks ago and scored a 95%..... which I hear is outstanding.  (proud mom again).

November 10, 2020

And it's official!  Last week.... he was sworn into the Air Force.    He is currently sorting through job opportunities with his recruiter and I can assume he'll be shipping out to basic in a few months.

Lucas has been very vague when we ask him for details.   

I can only assume that one Saturday he will clean his room for the last first time and announce that he'll be leaving on Monday.

And... just like that.... the nest will be empty.

hospitality

I just finished reading The Gospel Comes with a House Key: Practicing Radically Ordinary Hospitality in Our Post-Christian World, by Rosaria Butterfield.

There is no way I can paraphrase the main point of the book but let's say that it took me down a path of reminiscing days gone by.

I can recall my previous life circumstances, my previous homes, and the exorbitant amount of hospitality given and received over many years.   I have felt so much love in the homes of others and I have enjoyed filling my home with people as well.

At my last residence, I thrived when the house was full of laughter and energy.   Some of my favorite memories were fixing lunches for the neighborhood kids, kid sleepovers, movie nights, game nights, a snow day sleepover, nights by the campfire, kids running up and down the stairs, inviting my neighbors and friends to just come and hang out.
I spent many hours on porches and at kitchen tables talking, dreaming.      My Sunday Night Ladies group was birthed around my table and those ladies have been my lifeline.

I have always loved having overnight house guests as well.  Friends coming to visit, people needing a place to stay in town, or family coming for holidays.  I used to blow up air mattresses or put people on couches as needed.   Many people have endured the sub-zero temps in my old basement (with only a handful of complaints).     I may not have had the fanciest of houses... but I always wanted to extend an open door policy.

Mi casa, su casa.
I always give the disclaimer that I'm not the best host.... because I might forget the basic needs of guests.... but I always want people to  make themselves at home and feel welcome. 

Upon finishing the book..... I wondered what has happened to our society?!   The year 2020 has attempted to evaporate the simpliest definition of hospitatily.    We are shamed for gathering people together.   The art of hospitality is frowned upon.   Families are told not to gather for holidays.   We might kill our Grandparents if we have a meal together.   The guilt that has been attached to persuing our basic human needs is astounding to me.  

 God calls us to be hospitable.     The Bible describes hospitality as the inviting in of strangers, the inclusion of outcasts.     I'm certainly not the best at that.... but I want to start somewhere.   How can it be possible to make connections with the "outcasts' if we aren't even allowed to make connections with the people we know and love?     What does our new "normal" look like?!    I'm not willing to accept it.

I'm only months away from having an empty nest and I've been pondering what I can do once the house is quiet.    How can I be hospitible to those in need?  What does God want us to do with the extra space and time?  What's my next mission?

I recently created a lovely little guest room in Daniel's old space.  It's my first official guest room and I'm pretty giddy about it.

 I'm ready!  Who's coming to visit?!