reentry

My neighbor's husband came home today after being away, on the job, for weeks.
I wonder if his return lived up to the expectations of my friend and her kids. I wonder if there was a happy reunion, kind words shared, time spent together?
Or I wonder if his entrance back to home life was a bit bumpy.

I can remember when I would go away with friends for a weekend. I would have a BLAST being a "person" again... without any "mommy" responsibilties.
My reentry to "reality" was always very rough. I'd walk back into a messy house with loud kids. It was often such a plunge back to normalcy that I would be very grumpy with Thayer and the kids. Back to laundry, back to dishes, etc. etc. ugh.

And now that Thayer is gone, I can't help but wonder... if God suddenly said to Thayer, "sure, go back down there for a while. Only Jill will remember that you were gone. Everything else will go
back to normal..."
What would I do? Would I be a better wife? A better mother? Would I treasure every moment together? Would I be a better listener? An encourager? Would I be supportive and loving?
If I had a chance to do it all over again... how would I be?

I feel like we get so caught up with "life" that we forget to live.
We forget to love those who we love most.
We waste so much time.

I also wonder how I will be in the future.
I am prayerfully hoping that through this experience God is fashioning me for something greater.
Malachi 3:3 says: "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver." I am thankful that He is right here with me while the flames are the hottest.