cry/talk

Tonight, I sat and listened to L "cry/talk" himself to sleep. He wanted to be alone tonight which is understandable. (I do my best crying when I am alone too).
As a mother, hearing my son cry... there are just no words.
I sat in my room and prayed for him.

After hearing him tonight, I have come to a new understanding of, what I have termed, "cry/talk".
This is new for our family.... but another blogger calls it "blubbering".
That's really what it is:-)

I have realized that I seem to cry "better" if I say outloud what I am feeling. I only do this when I am alone and need a good cry. Just talking to God... telling him to send messages to Thayer... praying that Thayer can hear me for a few minutes... replaying what should have been... just saying what's on my mind, etc. etc.
The possibilities of cry/talk seem to be endless. That's why it usually ends with falling asleep.

I am writing so casually about this behavior because I find it interesting that humans are pretty much geared the same. L was never taught to blubber and I usually don't blubber but we both have started with this since Thayer's death. It seems to be a good coping mechanism for both of us.
I am so thankful that God has created us to be thinking, feeling, individuals.
And I'm really thankful that He listens to our "cry/talk".