out of my box

I think that over the last few weeks or possibly months, I've become pretty antsy. No doubt that I have been in a whirlwind since Thayer died....and I'm just starting to get a grip on my situation.
I think I'm at the point where I feel that God wants me to DO something. I don't have a clue WHAT... but just something.

... I have been blessed and served by a gazillion people over the last nine months. People have sacrificed so much for our litte family... time, talents, money, support, food, prayers. When I think of all the ways that people have blessed us... I am still in awe.
I remember how completely overwhelming everything was right after Thayer died. We never had been dependent on other people before and it was very difficult for me to accept the overwhelming responses from relatives, friends and strangers. We certainly didn't deserve such overwhelming kindness. (and I still feel so undeserving of it all)

But, I learned quickly that people served and gave because they wanted to... because they didn't know what to do... ultimately because God led them to serve in whatever way they were capable.
And there aren't words to express how thankful I am for everything. I just know that all the folks that have blessed us will certainly reap their rewards in heaven.

Since I have been on the receiving end of things for 9 months now... it's about time I start contributing in some small way.
Today, I made a TINY step out of my box and helped a local group do some painting.
When I heard that they needed help, my first thought was...
Aha! great opportunity Jill! Something "bigger" than yourself. Painting for the Lord... that's a great place to start. :-)

I knew one guy at the building... but I was submerged into a small group of complete strangers. That in itself was interesting. I met some great folks... and I felt odd explaining my situation to the folks that showed interest.
I've constantly been around people that "know" me... and I really stumbled over my words and explanations of my family. That was harder than I thought. I never know how much or how little to share... since my story usually puts a damper on most conversations.
I wanted to keep it light today but some people just had to ask. ;p

I'm kind of doubting that painting is my true calling (haha)... but I feel that God was happy with my little attempt to do His work. I was blessed to have the opportunity to serve today. It was a great experience for me and I'm anxious to be put to His work again...