peace

Our home generally has an air of anxiety and uneasiness.  I am determined to combat that.  A few days at the beach was just the reset I needed.  I have returned to the house determined to be more "chill", even when surrounded by crazy.  

I want to change my perspective and attitude toward our current situation.
The process of learning to change my perspective:  Prayers in the moment, deep breaths and meditating on things that remind me of how precious life is.   I can count my blessings.

 I am usually thinking 15 steps ahead about what needs to be done.  Anticipating needs and doing "the things" to make everyone's life more comfortable.   However I'm realizing that not everyone else runs in "go" mode all of the time.  I want to be more intentional about s l o w i n g down and taking time to recharge and relax.  That is totally out of character for me.... so I'm trying.

I want to be more intentional about living in the moment and finding peace within the uneasiness.

A pastor recently said, "Peace isn't found in circumstances, it's found in the presence of Christ".

The key is looking for, and seeing Jesus right where I am.

peace

I've had several rough evenings with my boys and church was a welcome relief today.   The worship songs seemed especially sweet this morning as I had a dear friend on my heart.

One song in particular stood out as my prayer for her today.   "Peace" by Brian Morykon.  Based on Mark 6:42-52 



As the day went on I kept singing the song, and praying for my friend, when I realized that God was also talking to me!

After these rough days with my boys, I finally had a little temper tantrum last night directed at God and Thayer.   I cried out to Thayer....  as if he's listening :)... that HE is supposed to be here to help with these kids.  I never imagined dealing with pre-teen attitudes on my own.   I was weepy and upset with Thayer.   How dare he leave me here with these kids?!   What am *I* supposed to do with these kids?  I'll never manage on my own!

And today..... God said "Whoa!.... Have you forgotten where we've been?  You're not alone in this!  I have provided for you from the start.  Remember all that you've been blessed with?  This road that we have journeyed together?  All of the support that you have? 
How quickly you have forgotten!"

Just like the disciples in Mark 6!  Those guys had just witnessed a miracle as Jesus fed thousands of people with a tiny amount of fish and bread.   They went out in their boat and it got a little windy.  Jesus went out to them.... walking on the water... and they were terrified, thinking he was a ghost.    Jesus calmed the wind and they were "completely amazed".
They had totally missed what had just happened with the fish and bread because 'their hearts were hardened".

Really?  How can we, like the disciples, keep missing the miracles?!  And why does Jesus need to show himself over and over and over before we see the blessings that He showers on us?

I want to make a point to remember the blessings I have been given.    I want the peace that God gives when we acknowledge the fact that HE is in control.  
The waves are under Him.